Jonathan Fischer’s Childhood, the fiction of the life of the “Calling Gift”
On an Easter Sunday about forty years ago the hero of this story, Jonathan Fischer, was born in a hospital in Stuttgart. The baby was six days over the calculated time, had a rich weight of six kilogramme, and an amazing body length of sixty centimetre. The midwife spoke enthusiastically of a lucky kid, forwhy at the birth was braided a cap around his little face, coming from the amniotic sac, and an unusual birthmark in the shape of a cross adorned his chest. The doctor irritated the port-wine stains on the lower lip and the haemangioma on the forehead, which gave the infant an mysterious appearance. After eight days the baby had to undergo a surgery on the scalp, and thus got drawn a strange antenna in the front hairline, originated from the postoperative scar. And in fact, the most unusual experiences should take place in Jonathan Fischer’s life. First of all, the external circumstances seemed not to be the best for a happy childhood.
Jonathan’s parents had become acquainted in the Nicholas Care, a facility for the promotion of blind and visually handicapped, where they too learned to love each other. Before they married, the doctors assured that the children not hereditary have to be blind, and really they got two healthy sons. Jonathan was five years younger than his brother Thomy. That’s why he tried to emulate this role model in everything. As one of the first things, he took his Lego bricks, with which he worked alone for hours. They had a nice time when Thomy took him to the Youth Center to play soccer on the sports field. At a ball game at home once even a vase broke, which was hastily pasted together to cover up the wild activities. The greatest joy for Jonathan was playing together with his brother Carrera race track or rail. When the brothers quarrelled heavily at a Christmas Eve, the Christ Child brought the two highly anticipated Märklin locomotives only after the late-night Christmas Eve mass. The only serious experience in Jonathan’s childhood was a slight children abuse, and a little hardship he felt was the missing driver’s license of his parents. It was a minor miracle seeing the parents mastering the everyday life. His beloved mother Anna run the household with flying colours and his father Alfred supplied the family well with his dreary day in and day out office work.
In school, Jonathan was a guy spoiled by success. He was in constant competition with his best friends, Walter and Frank, with whom he had already gone to kindergarten, who will get the highest grades. Jonathan loved to remember the day when they were children just starting school. He enjoyed the picture in the schoolyard of the Anne Frank Elementary School, where they all were holding their coloured candy-filled paper funnels. His friends Walter and Frank Stone, the throughout identical dressed twins, were staying in the thirteenth floor of the Salute skyscraper in Stuttgart Fasanenhof. Jonathan lived exactly seven floors downstairs, in a same-cut four-room apartment. Logically the three friends assembled up and down in the high-rise apartments, to spent a lot of leisure time together. The skyscraper had a huge playground where they could live out their happy childhood. In winter, they sleighed down the so-called salad hillock on the wooden slide, and in the summer they cycled on extensive bike tours through the picturesquely situated Sevenmillsvalley. The only dangerous situation arose, when they explored the nearby canal tube of the Körsch river, for firefighters had to rescue the disoriented blood brethren. In elementary school, the three friends in tests almost always got straight A’s. During the breaks they played football in the schoolyard, or else they duelled in little wrestling matches. Yes, even in solving math problems, doing the ordinary homework, and in their reports, each one of them wanted to be the best. The unnatural triplets were inseparable and quickly put the course to visit the high school.
The greatest joy for Jonathan was to go on vacation, visiting a farm of his relatives, in the Black Forest village of Fishermillcreek. He had a cousin named Wolfram, with whom he made similar experiences in nature, as did Heidi in the famous children’s book of Johanna Spyri. In the morning they drove cows to the hill pasture, riding on the back of the grazing animals. On the way back home they enjoyed to pursue their toy planes, which were gliding in nearly endless curves towards the valley. The boys habitually laid down under the the cows in a forest glade and tapped on their udders. With their pocket knives, they carved bow and arrow, so that they would be prepared to meet rabid foxes. The cousins loved it to be taken from their grandfather on the back of a green jeep to the hunting grounds. The surrounding forest areas had plenty of dear stands, where they walked together with Waldi, the dog. The children’s hearts melted regularly, holding the small farm dogs as pet in their hands, and getting licked in their faces. As nighttime adventurer they took their battery torches to flashlight everything. Intentionally or not, a newly enamoured couple was scarred to death, as the light shone into their lonely car. Going on a run, the two vagabonds visited the neighbour’s children, dormant in their outdoor tents, just to tore off the pegs from the ropes, waking up everyone. As they went, like Max and Moritz, too far and wanted to hijack the flag of a Royal Ranger camp, they were caught and tied by the night guard and under boisterous laughter thrown into the next liquid manure. Grandma Mary comforted her grandchildren the next day with her favourite egg dish dumb-is.
The happiest day of Jonathan’s life was approaching. He prepared himself in unison with his cousin for the First Communion and went every day by bicycle to early mass. On the day of the feast he was overwhelmed, not only by receiving the most amazing gifts, but he even had his first supernatural experience of God. After taking the Lord’s Supper he felt God’s presence absolutely overpowering, so that it seemed like an invisible force was holding him in the church pew, as though he never would loose this stunning feeling. It looked strange, when he was left alone in the service, while the other boys in their blue velvet suits and with their white candles went outside in front of the baroque church. Aunt Sophie and Uncle Fritz supported Jonathan, giving a hand and finding the way out. His relatives reckoned that he had inhaled to much frankincense.
During his holidays Jonathan often went into his beloved Black Forest. This time he first visited his grandaunt Theresa Louise Fischer in the monastery. She was 84 years old. With Age 24 she bore the religious name Sister Hanna. Jonathan was invited for coffee and cake and then went into the chapel to pray a rosary with the grandaunt. They both sat alone on a front pew and recited towards the Blessed Mother’s statue. At the end of the endless running repetitions the old nun took his hand and began to prophesy: “You’re going to be a Catholic bishop, and even higher things are possible. With men this is impossible, not so with God. All things are possible with God.” Jonathan was agreeably affected. The warm hand of his sister also touched his heart. Instead of hitting chess books, he read the Family Gift Bible from front to back. Of course he didn’t understand most of the stories with the result that the matter was forgotten. Nevertheless, he adopted a basic knowledge that would be useful in later times.
Keeping on moving to the great Black Forest farm with the address Fishmillcreek 22, Jonathan was looking forward to share his time with Wolfram, as they made a lot of nonsense in the Astrid Lindgren style of Emil of Lönneberga. First of all, the horse of grandfather Sepp got shy, traversing under an apricot tree, for a jumping cracker was let off at the very moment from the scallywags. When the firework croaking was over, poor old grandpa was sitting on his wet ass in the creek. The unacceptable ass about apology forgotten, they all drove in the afternoon with the tractor in the pine forest. On the way back, making the attempt to turn into the confusing valley road, the old driver asked his guest grandchildren whether the route is clear. Jonathan had the better view for the simple reason that he was sitting raised on the wing. Handicapped by a large tooth gap in the upper incisors the Swabian stuttered “Po-liiiiii-ssssss” what the deaf grandfather translated as “free is” into Alemannic German. The maniac act of the clash smashed two front ends. At least the police could secure the accident without being called furthermore. The next day, after Sepp had calmed down a little, he went into his dark shed to set up his new liquor distillery. The cherries were grown to mash, the mash was distilled and got ready for the brandy. The grandfather had a bit of a guilty conscience, since he had not yet received the permission to burn. The more he was pleased in his spirit with the first taste of the illicit distilled clear cherry water. In the moment, when he wanted to mingle a little spring water, Jonathan suddenly cried out: “Po-liiiiii-ssssss.” The frightened grandfather let the precious amount of 60 liters quickly run into the collateral fish pond. The tipsy trouts of his pond, right away took a bath in the sun and breathed out the ultimate Black Forest Spirit. Jonathan proved himself to be innocent, as the neighbourhood kids on their visit, wanted simply to hear again a loud announcement of yesterday’s traffic alert. At least, with the precious cherry mash, the young jesters were able to do something useful and catered the pigs. The chicken also took a fancy to it, together with the sausage dog Waldi, who habitually begged for goodies. Soon Jonathan was reminded of his carousel rides and visits to the beer tent at the Stuttgart Festival, when his eyes followed the drama. The poor animals got dizzy, stumbled to the ground and fell deeply exhausted asleep. The worst jokes happened all at one:
On one of their gold digging tours in the Fishmillcreek the two found, instead of the desired three gold nuggets, just two lead balls, which had fired a hunter. They “borrowed” an air rifle and figured out, who would be the better shooter. Jonathan took as target a black bird in 39 meters distance, which he aptly named Willibald Raven. The unfortunate bird was resting on a magic apotropaic wooden stake. Jonathan’s shot was deliberately levelled 13 centimeters over the big bill of the loudly grouching crow who got out immediately. Three of the tail feathers had flown down and landed on the dung heap. Wolfram took aim with the second shot on two round pink bullseyes as targets in 50 meters distance and hit the aim point as well. According to the squeaky noise of the boar who shed tears, the beast was hit straightly in whatever ass. Granddad mowed clueless the grass and had to pay for the infamous action of his rig running grandsons. As outcome of the outrage of the furious boar, he received two canine teeth in the leg. Sepp, the Grandfather, retaliated the act and stabbed the animal with his scythe to death. The two Pumuckls and the rifle had been quickly vanished in the air. The boar, who run away like a stabbed pig, came a few months later explosively to life. The innocent grandfather destroyed two fillings in his mouth, as he was munching on the smoked Black Forest ham with the unexpected gun projectile inside.
Jonathan and Wolfram were combating to try out who is the stronger. The small and snappy heir of the farm was getting through hard labour and growing age more and more muscles. No question that Wolfram also won numerous other duels in his favourite sport of amateur wrestling. With all due respect Jonathan would never have the nerve to hook the monstrous breeding bull on the nosering, to bring him out of the stable for mating. Standing in the rain, the pubescent teenager went for further studies under the roof of the bee house, smoking a self-made cigar rolled from an exiting newsprint and filled with sawdust. The observation from bunny ads in the magazines, which had hidden the big brother in the penthouse, the two playboys approved all the same as interesting. Even more attention aroused, when a carelessly thrown away sawdust-incendiary inflamed the rotten wood. In turn the “Po-liiiiii-ssssss” had to come back. This time, however, together with the fire department. This was the final straw, for then the two wretches were locked into two little chambers of the villages Gothic tower which was visible from afar. Jonathan sat on the left, Wolfram at the right and in the middle the country curate Joseph Peccadillo, who heard the sinners youth confessions, one after the other, called over a piece of paper. As punishment for the next seven days, Jonathan had to clean the sheep house, a straw fork in his hand, and Wolfram transported the steaming bull shit with the ox cart to the dunghill.
Back in Stuttgart, a certain jealousy arose in the musty smelling Jonathan against the brilliant Stone-twins, inasmuch as they had begun to surpass him in their scholastic achievements. He felt it was unfair that his parents did not speak English and French and could not take him on vacation to New York or Paris, as his playmates were privileged. Also in his homework, he could not get the same support, as it was possible by the academic Stone-parents. One day, he was invited from Walter and Frank to visit the Chess Club Fasanenhof which made him upset, since they again had more experience and were superior to him in their training skills. But this visit was a mark in Jonathan’s life for years, getting really addicted to this royal game. He swallowed a chess book after another and soon had an idol in the reigning world chess champion. The first successful results were not long in coming: Jonathan defeated not only his friends on a regular basis, but also the other peers. The greatest joy for Jonathan happened, when he won a Youth Tournament organized by the Dresdner Bank, making advertisement for the green ribbon of sympathy, at a horticultural country show. The reward was a valuable pewter plate and three five-gram gold bars. The big dream of becoming World Champion in Chess got confirmed. Later Jonathan really played a game against his idol in a television contest in Cologne. It was not the competition of the World Chess Championship, but the last sixteen round of the Chess Germany Cup, which the knockout German lost of course.
Jonathan spent of and on time with the twins, who come to be completely different. Walter progressed as the most brilliant in school, and Frank became increasingly interested in the female sex. Thus, the gigolo created a sensation in the Queen Charlotte High School when he impregnated the self-conscious school spokeswoman. The pacifist and opponent of nuclear power was three years older than Frank and bore the suitable name Maxima Gravid. During the school, at meetings of the peace initiative, Jonathan was over and over surprised, when the lights were turned out, so that they could grope each other in a dark game. Walter was allowed at the first time with age fifteen to participate in the National Youth Research and was promptly winner in physics because he improved the relativity theory. He bugged his teachers regularly, for he corrected them in class, and even the Ministry of Culture was not safe from him. Numerous serious mistakes in physics and math books had to be improved because of the greatness of his mind. Also great sensation was caused on Walter’s homepage, where he presented his latest discoveries of science free of charge to the world. His jealous brother Frank was malicious and rebellious. He got tattoos and piercings on his illegally shaved head and wanted to know none about the joys of fatherhood. Therefore, he urged his liaison to an abortion. Thus, the two most obvious nicknames of the school in Möhringen arose. Frank Stone was called “Frankenstein”, and Walter Stone was given the nickname “Einstein”.
In Jonathan came up the desire to get himself a girlfriend. His fraternal model Thomy was a sort of Casanova who chatted up one pretty girl after another. His Harley Davidson license plate with the S-EX 66 would even coincide with his table of 66 conquests. The blond-haired Jonathan was pretty uptight and emotionally hurt due to his large tooth gap. Once he wanted to flirt with unfamiliar girls on the tram, but at the very moment, when he began to open his mouth, they ridiculed him. Nevertheless, he nearly was successful to get a well known female chess champion in his bed, after holding hands on a visit of the Stuttgart Beer Festival. At that night, he had an open house at his place, which led to a tender conversation that lasted into the morning hours. However, the inamorata had enough intelligence and a precise sense of touch. The “true” love and friendship fizzled out for both noticed that he was looking just for a rumpy-pumpy.
During his military service it turned out that his tooth displacement was caused by a maxillary tumour, which had to be surgically removed. The goal in life of Jonathan was to be admitted in the Bundeswehr sports promotion section and to obtain the title of a chess grandmaster. His scholastic achievement was getting worse, while he preferred to secretly solve chess problems. The high-school graduate got privily proud about being stronger in the spirit hobby than the professor of mathematics of his chess club. Instead of preparing for the Abitur writings, Jonathan preferred to compete at a great Chess Tournament in Boeblingen during Christmas holidays. As one of his best results, he shared the second place upon three hundred participants. Happiness hormones were released until he received the results of the exam. He expected bad things, since he was mentally blocked in the German test, only writing three pages. Three times 2 of 15 possible points in the Abitur writings was a result, which made his teachers believe, that a repetition of the 13th class is inevitable. Now Jonathan’s fighting spirit awoke in school. His type and character was one of an endurance kind, for he loved extensive runs throughout the forest and won many chess games, only because he was able to maintain his concentration constantly. The tactical game with 32 figures on a 64-field board often lasted 6 to 8 hours before the result became clear. Jonathan began cramming for three weeks until the wee hours. As one of the few people, he wanted to be examined orally in four subjects, in order to avoid a repeat of the last school year. Ironically, the Catholic priest in his final oral exam subject religion played the tip on the scales. Jonathan loved and revered pastor Benz, and it was mutual. The second-worst high school result, with a grade point average of 3,9, was still a cause for rejoicing and celebration for both. In contrast Einstein, his friend, was the best school pupil with disappointing grade average of 1,1. Displeased he would finish eagerly his doctor and professor in physics with the best possible results. The twin-brother Frank Stone had similar concentration problems, as Jonathan with a 3,6 Abitur. His dream to become a forest ranger had to be buried. In return “Frankenstein” got engaged as machine-operator on a huge circular saw in wood processing.
Jonathan immediately tried to achieve the ideal case, to make his hobby into a profession. At the start of his military service he received a salary from the state, even as he travelled around Europe, playing tournaments to obtain his international master norms in chess. In this time of his life the affection for money was getting bigger, for he wanted to finance and maintain a new car. Jonathan managed beforehand to smash his first car, which his parents had fully paid, whereby he almost killed himself. With a loud curse he crashed diagonally into the front of a truck, since he was driving much too fast through a sharp curve, being accompanied by blustering rap music. Like a donkey, carrying hard work as census taker and temporary mail carrier, the next car was funded. Jonathan also did not like the competition with Russian players, for everyone wanted to cut the biggest piece of cake of the prize money. He became acquainted with Evgeny, one of the top ten players and Russian Super Grandmasters, who took over the leadership in his Munich Bundesliga team. Due to this engagement the team, consisting of eight players, reached the European League. Arriving at higher altitudes, Jonathan acknowledged that he had to sacrifice all leisure time activities for his sport, to keep up with his teammates. Seeing that a coaching job came along just at the right time, Jonathan had not much to think. In virtue of the disability of his parents, Jonathan spent much time in meetings with blind people, and right now the Blind National Team was looking for a new paid coach. He took the job and achieved an excellent third place with his team in the Blind Chess Olympiad in Transylvania. A following ceremony with the Federal Chancellor Helmut Kohl and Minister for Home Affairs Wolfgang Schäuble was utilized from Jonathan to impress a beautiful, old school friend. His self-confidence concerning women had increased not only because of his successes, but also due to an effective odontotherapy.
To whatever extent the night together in the hotel did not lead to the desired performance for Jonathan had too much awe. The latest bodybuilder lover of his attractive companion commanded all of Jonathan’s respect with the threat of violent strokes, if he would not maintain his virginity, right at the departure to Palais Schaumburg. The ultimate goal to find a mate was transported in his thoughts before God. In a “Our Father who art in heaven”- prayer the hero of this story made an intercession for a fitting strong chess player as wife.
Alfred and Anna Fischer didn’t know his secret wishes, and they thought it would be time of another change in searching an approved job. Jonathan agreed and focused now on building a successful career in banking. To his delight, he was class winner and was promoted in an exemplary manner from his superiors of the people’s bank. The payment was better and the pressure to succeed not as big, which helped him to achieve middle-class affluence. In the mid-twenties Jonathan was making plans where to spend his next vacation. So he went to a travel agency in Stuttgart’s King Street. The desire was awakened in him to fly to Kenya. Kenya was the country of many long-distance runners whom he admired. In the days, he was allowed to stay in the Bundeswehr sports promotion section in Warendorf, he was training together with the German long distance runners, living in the neighbour barrack room. Naturally they also enjoyed watching marathon running and other sport events on TV. Jonathan had a good reputation in the sports group as he easily could participate in a ten kilometer run and also outdistanced many other athletes in the 5000 meter distance run, attaining the German Sport Badge. He couldn’t know, that not before long, he would make the most amazing experiences with the world most famous athletes.